Negative

From the day I start to work in ward, there's lots of obstacles and it's troubled me LOTS!! Made me very disappointed and sad, also cried lots for it... I don't know who should I talk to, just can keep it in my heart, till I can't handle it -- tears out. Feel like want to escape from here, feel like want to go back home, feel like want to see my family and friends..... I don't want to be weak, but sometimes the mind just can't control it, and it suffered me.

But still, some people had give me blessing and it really relief me. Although I'm still in that mood, but at least not that bad....

Now I need the strength to hold me to conquer all these~ Please God give me that strength!

I really need some time to solve it......


- Waiting for the rain stop -

.Pieces.

Broken in pieces....
I can't grab it....
By my hands....
Anything can't cure it....
Become as one again....
It's impossible......

I don't know...
What can I do for it...
Just can cry.....
For the whole day......

It might remind me that......
We can't be together.......
I suppose to know about that.....
But why.......?
I still hoping that tiny miracle........


So sad....................



How stupid am I....

CNY Holiday [Friends Part]

17/2/10(Wed) CNY 4th Day!
Went out with Xiong and Beng~ We went to new Jusco again. There's not a good choice for friends gathering because there's not much entertainment to do. But we 3 just wanted to chit chatting~ Accidentally met Miao and Sum~ We went to eat shabu-shabu (should I called it like that?). the service was totally bad and I think I won't go there eat for the second time except someone treat me. Haha~ Then we watched Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief , damn awesome~ Percy was so cute~ After that we yam cha at near my housing estate mamak shop and met Meh Meh, Xian Moi & Pauline~ It was a nice small gathering since we had a long time didn't meet each other~ :)

With Beng~

With Xiong~ Don't know why my face look so moody... :P

Very ordinary meal....:D

18/2/10(Thu) CNY 5th Day!
Rest at home and doing nothing~ I was waiting Mian and Negi coming back from vacation~ Luckily at night managed to call out all secondary school friends for tomorrow's gathering! Sms till my phone out of memory.... LOL~

19/2/10(Fri) CNY 6th Day!
Event: 拜年咯~
Venue: Houses that we went in AK~

1st house - JT's house
I and Mian reached there and we 3 were waiting for others come~ When I saw JT wear gold necklace and ring, I was so shocked~ But really feel admire after his explanation~ Tak sangka you think so deeply~ His brother's dog-- YoYo was really scared me although it's really cute~ I kept escape from it but the most kesian people is Nyamuk. Once he entered his house, YoYo straight away jumped to his body~ It made all of us laughed~ Nyamuk's face turn to helpness, but we can't do anything.... Haha~

2nd house - Soo Ying's house
We went there and watched Power Sunday~ Dogs are not available to have fun with them, because they were so dangerous~ JT kept kacau the dog, and the dog kept woowwowow~ =="

3rd house - My house
They finally started to gamble. They all kept talk with my mom. Haha~ Won some money from banker MK and Nyamuk~ Hehe~

Rest and eat lunch at outside restaurant....

4th house - Negi's house
Continued gambling at there~ Because Negi and his family just back from Thailand, so lots of souvenir that his mom showed to us~ But the most I like is Wisky, contained 40% alcohol~ Haha~ Ham kept asking me to drink it, but I'm surely will sleep at Negi's house if I drink it~ So just bring back~ LOL~ Drank and it made my face very red (all my friends said so) and I felt hot, kept going to toilet to PU~ Haha~

5th house - Nyamuk's house
Opened CNY songs very old tradisional type, I can't stand with it and we all laughed.... And stupid JT and Ham talked nonsense things to me when we read the Latina catalog... Kek sei!! Suddenly some of them said want to watch movie because of the hot weather~ So we took group photo before go to watch movie~ Negi and JT didn't follow us because they got things to do during night...

Two cars were heading to DP and guys bought 14 Blades~ Before movie we went to eat McD for dinner~ After eat when we want to wash hands, I can't open the water tap, then I asked Ham how to open, but made him laughed of me... So embarrassed~ 10 of us watched it with running into the cinema because we wanted to get better seats~ Haha~ Movie was nice and Wu Zhun very funny, made me laughed because of his slogan~ It was a damn nice gathering since we all had a long time didn't meet~ Then we all decided tomorrow go to sing k!

At Negi's house gambling~

Tiring till slept in Nyamuk's house...

Gambling....

Kawaii Meh Meh~

Me and Fern~

Big smile~ :D

Act as tiger~ Roooar~~ Damn funny and crazy! But I ♥ it~

Eating McD again~

Before going back~

Beautiful wisky~ Hehe~

20/2/10(Sat) CNY 7th Day!
Sing K at DreamBox was a wonderful moments~ We all shouted and sang all the songs that we usually will sing~ Unlike last time, MK and Xian Moi became brave and sing out very loud~ Ham sing very intoxicated, damn funny~ Cat's high pitch really made me very admired of her~ Miao's singing still is the best! And others also no bad~ We also forced YK and J.Shen to sing Y2J <为你而活>~ LOL~ It's satisfied!

After sing K, Cat and Miao suggested to watch The Wolfman~ After bought the ticket, Ham used that long ticket and stick it to my forehead to make a chinese zombie~ Really made me sweat~ Before movie we went to waterfall there and play fishing... And took some photos with them~ That movie was really bored and I almost sleep in the cinema~ Once the movie ended, we all blamed on the person who suggested... Haha~ Then went to play bowling, but I didn't play~ After that went for dinner at food court... Nyamuk kept asking me lots of "If...." questions (secondary school he tends to play with me) and made me no appetite to eat anymore.... ==" On the way to back home, talked stupid things with Mian, Ham and MK, we all laughed and kept shoot each other~ Haha~ It's really a wonderful gathering!! Thanks to all of you~ And hope we can gather like this again~

Enjoying sing K~They all are trying to fishing...

Nyamuk is trying to fish it~

Shiny~

21/2/10(Sun) CNY 8th Day!
The day to go back KL~ Actually tomorrow still my holiday and I'll start my posting on 23/2 but because of some reasons, I have to go back on this day~ Sorry that can't go back with you... I was really moody but yet still packing things to prepare myself back to hospital and posting.... Noon I was thinking want go to outside~ Maybe of too long period didn't drive and nervous, I accidentally "kiss" my door gate~ Car wasn't damage but the gate slightly bevel.... Haiz~ I don't know how to make me have that previous confident to drive in the road again.... While my dad was helping me to reverse the car back, accidentally JT saw me standing outside of my house... OMG~ I think my good name has spoiled.... T.T

Before back to KL, went to Pasar Malam to get some dinner~ I met some of my friends and neighbors~ Suddenly felt like very sad to leave here... But I have no choice, because this is the way that I had already choose for my future~ So must gambateh work!! Fighting!!!!

Pity door gate~

P/S: It's complicated.... But I'm still figuring out....
I will ♥ u all always!

CNY Holiday [Family Part]

13/2/10 (Sat)
Today was the new year eve! As usual went to my grandma's house and tidy up the house while all the women cooked for the reunion lunch (our traditional)~ Since my mom wanted to use that MFM brand flour, I and my sis with my grandma was rounding and found that flour, ended up I went to Jusco and bought it~ When I showed to my sis, only she told me that she saw it at the 1st shop that we stopped by, but my sis and my grandma was thinking that it shouldn't be the one that my mom wanted~ I was like "OMG~ wasting our time and petrol..."

About 1.30pm we started to eat our reunion lunch~ Then after that have some rest and continue tidy up the house and then we 3 sis went to MM to buy CNY things~ After that back to grandma house to bring mom back home~ When almost midnight, mom and dad started to give angpau for us~ First time ever give angpau before 1st day of CNY~ Mom also gave me extra angpau for my birthday! Hehe~ And when the time reached 12am, lots of birthday wishes from FB, sms and calls received! Thanks for everyone who wished me~ And the presents also!

Reunion lunch! I ♥ Homecook~

14/2/10 (Sun) CNY 1st Day!
As usual went to grandma house and met my relatives~ Noon time we all cousins went to new Jusco for the sake of get some air-condition because my grandma house is too hot!! Having fun time with them~ And also today was my birthday, I get extra angpau as present from relatives! Hehe~

Family ♥

Cousins~

Start game~

Guan Sheng Gong-- Champion for the Lion competition~ Nice show although did fall down twice~

"Huh?"Tea time with cousins~

15/2/10(Mon) CNY 2nd Day!
Went to my uncle house which located in Bemban -- my mom's hometown! Met long-time-no-see relatives and won some money from gambling~ Hehe~ Evening time went back home and have a good rest!

16/2/10 (Tue) CNY 3rd Day!
Went to my aunty house for annual family gathering~ Having fun with them~ This year my luck is not bad, didn't lose money from gambling! Then talked with my little cousins, they all grew up so fast and the way they talk was made me so shocked , it made me feel like I getting older and older... We all also sing K since there's karaoke player~ Almost midnight play PSP with my lengzai cousin while listening all my aunty, uncle, mom and dad singing K~ Haha~

With my little cousin~

Surprised Birthday Celebration!

12/2/10 (Fri)
After class 12pm, straight away went to cafeteria eat my lunch and back to room to pack my things again. Thought will reach home quite early but unfortunately ended up 6.30pm only depart and reach home 9pm. I was afraid that can't gather with them, but luckily Negi phoned me and said "Never mind la, tonight cannot meet then tomorrow night only meet lor~". His words made me more comfort and because of his wrong message passed to me, I knew that it will be unusual gathering for that night....

Waited at home for so long time till i slept, suddenly I heard someone called my name, my hair was untidy but yet still woke up and see who's that, I was so shocked to see 3 guys in a car and they was looking at me and laughed~ OMG, memper-sia-sui-kan me only... Faster changed clothes and heading to fetch Mian~ Went to Station 1 but it's fulled of people, then we decided to went to Xuan's Cafe~ I knew that they will celebrate my birthday (actually it should be surprised) but never thought they will ask the singers to sing birthday song and everyone in that cafe was looking at me~ Oh man, damn embarrassed~ But somehow, I was really happy and shy to receive all the wishes and blessings~ Luckily they celebrated at there, if not I think my face surely will be fulled with creams... Thanks to Mian, Negi, Ham, MK and J.Shen, you all really made me felt very touching~ Although I knew everyone were so tired.... :)

Birthday cake~~ :)

Evil smile~ Hehe~

Thanks alot! :D

Mian's present! I love it~ Muaks~

P/S: My birthday wishes are secret!! Hehe~

Recently....

My 1st ever to win lucky draw prize~~ :D
My petsis gave me as CNY wishes~~
Some birthday presents and CNY gifts~

Last few days really made me damn exhausted, just because of the exam!!! All my brain is full of hormones, bones, infection, inflammation, medicines, therapy, interventions and bla bla bla..... @_@ What we focus more of that particular topic didn't come out in the exam, my jaw almost dislocated when saw the exam paper~ =='' So just write what I know.... Ai ya~ All these already past, don't want to think more about it~~

But although CNY is just left 2 more days, but my feeling is no that kind of mood~ Something is disturbing my mind..... Tried to be more passion but it just can't.... :( All I wanna do is just to be freedom!!

And also... Valentine's is coming soon, that means my 19th birthday also just the corner... I had received some birthday presents from my college friends~ Thanks alot since you all have that good faith to give me presents, also thanks to the people who wished me earlier~ Frankly to say that I have no expectancy for this, because I knew that's gonna be a problem when I always wanted to make more fun for my birthday..... Haiz~~~ So, just see what will happen on that day~

So I'm going to be at Melaka for about 1 week plus~ Just want to relax myself!!! Hope what I planned can just go smoothly~ Looking forward of that!! :)

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR~

P/S: Be passionate!!!

Focus~~

Yes, I knew that I'm worry....
But.... I hate this feeling....
It made me can't focus on it and keep disturbing my mind....
The most important is I need to focus!!
If not, how am I going to pass my exam??
I hate it!!

Please make my mind clear!!!
Enter all the data that might come out from exam...
Save what am I suppose to study for the exam...
Delete all the negative thought.....
Ctrl my CNY mood!!


P/S: Study study study~~
7 days to go back hometown and start my 1 week plus holiday to celebrate CNY!!