Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Tonight I'm getting over you

其实这个问题真的存在很久了,快要一年的时间。连我身边的人都看不下去叫我别傻了,看到了这么多血淋淋的证据,我才能坦然地告诉自己别再欺骗自己了。

说实话,我真的从来没想过,与你这么奇妙的相遇,竟搞到我这么地受尽折磨。为何我原本的闲来无事,让你闯进了我的世界里,就让我这么地想要依赖着你,不愿再放手。理智总是告诉我,这个人很危险,别再靠近了,要不然可就受尽了委屈。可是我总是不信邪,慢慢地掉入了你设下的陷阱。现在可好了,我不知道该怎么办,才能狠下心抛开你的一切。心真的很痛,不知该做什么才能忘了这一切。其实那时你对我你朋友经历的短暂失忆,我多么地想要那个会是我,让我忘记你对我的一切,好让我不再心痛伤心了。

我真的很感激你对我的一切,让我感到我真的是很幸福。不过,关于所谓关系的界面图,让不止是我还是我身边的人都感到匪夷所思。或许对你来说这不是个问题,但我会感到很困扰。你的好害到我很自私地想拥有,不过你却没那个意思,那我很尴尬叻。该放下还是争取,会成为永远的谜。你其实很自私,这是个事实。我很恨你的大方和爱心泛滥,虽然那是你的魅力之一。你怎么能这样对我,明知我和你的性格相似,会了解我的想法,却又视若无睹。
我想我真的别再这么傻了,是时候该放下,好让自己的心别再受伤了。你或许觉得是我想太多了,不过一切都无所谓了。

献给你这首歌,让一切都回归零吧…

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Encouragement From Special Persons

I was doing my second night yesterday, since it's weekend and the next day is an very important day for our country, so left very less patients in the hospital. So I had my chance to chit chatting with my patients while I'm on my way to take observations.

The first patient admitted again within 4 days duration due to his gastric problem and perhaps some post op complication or side effect which we all don't know what actually cause him like that. His wife asked me whether will going to vote tomorrow. I told her that I need to work still and I'm not a local, plus my name is not in the list although I did registered since last year June. They was shocked and talked alot regarding this. Then we talked about nursing progression in this world, they encouraged me to go oversea and work after my bond finished. I planned to do so since ever I joined this profession, but I will definitely continue my studies first before stepped out from this country. Without a degree post will be quite hard to get a job with good paid at oversea. But maybe my mind will change after few years later as time goes by, they wished me to have a good future as nursing is a worldwide recognized job.

Then another patient who was admitted a week already due to her backache. The first night when I was serving medications for her, she suddenly talked about my lentigo on my right chin which will bring me a very fortunate luck, and I will getting married with a rich guy. I was so shocked and told her that actually I had an idea to remove it since I was small. She strongly refused me to remove it as she said it was a gift from God and marked on my face, so that it will bring luck for my future. I actually really had a goosebump when she told me all those as she gave me the advices of what I worried the things for years. I laughed and asked her how would you know all these. She said it's a destiny that God sent me to here and met you, to tell you all these. That overwhelming feeling within my heart can't fade off till now, I sit down in front of my laptop to jot down all these moments. She really encouraged me to be an independent and knowledgeable women, help others while we can, take a good care of our own family, then the Mr Right will come and meet us whenever time reached. We shake our hands before ended our conversations and I truly appreciated of what she said. Thank you so much for boost me up my hesitations and doubt, I'll be a better person and bring all those cheerful smile to the others.

I believe I can achieve what I dreamed off. My good life will comes eventually! Challenges accepted! =)